Jake Spearin

Jake Spearin

Fayetteville, West Virginia

Liz: “What is your greatest accomplishment so far?”

Jake: “Hm. I'm gonna have to say that it would be that I am able to hold down a job, and not let my speech impediment get the better of me. Despite the days where I felt like just giving up.”

L: “That's a excellent accomplishment. What would you say is your greatest fear?”

J: “Speaking in public, most definitely.”

L: “Is that something you have to deal with often?”

J: “No, it's not. It's also not something I actively try to do, though.”

L: “What is one of the funniest/most idiotic responses who have heard in response to your stutter?”

J: “Probably the typical ‘Slow down,’ ‘Take a deep breath,’ ‘Think about what you want to say.’I was once called ‘Waterboy,’ if you've ever seen that movie.”

L: “What is the best piece of advice you've ever been given?”

J: “That I should stand up for myself if I feel I am being mistreated for my impediment. I shouldn't be treated differently just because I'm ‘not like the rest.’”

L: “What is something you want people to know about your stutter?”

J: “That this has made me a better person, a more understanding and caring person because of it. I know what it's like to be different than others, to be laughed at and ridiculed, and that's not something I can do to others.”

Keep calm and stutter on!

Peter Loring

 Peter Loring

New York

Liz: “Have you ever felt limited by your stutter?”

Peter: “Growing up I had my limitations because of my speech. I used it to turn to music as a way to express myself. By the time I was 19, I'd played at Lincoln Center, Carnegie Hall, Alice Tully Hall, Avery Fischer Hall, and had done hundreds of gigs, so... I found another avenue to express myself in spite of my speech.”

L: “That's amazing! What do you play?”

P: “Clarinet, sax, oboe, flute, bassoon, guitar, bass, drums, piano, keyboard percussion, violin, viola, cello, mandolin, and I sing.”

L: “What have you learned from living with a stutter?”

P: “The world has good people and a**holes in it. I learned more patience as I got older. I learned that my "adversity" is easier than some people's and not even in the same galaxy as others. I learned that, really, it’s only my voice. My brain works fine, and I do like to use my brain, so if I've got something to say, the other person.... can wait.”

L: “What a positive outlook!”

P: “At 21, I was the assistant manager for Sam Goody. If you're not old enough, it was a record store. (Yes, they actually existed at one point in time) I had a whole staff underneath me, it was fun. The following summer I was a counselor at a camp run by UCP (United Cerebral Palsy). Now THOSE kids had issues. Many were in wheel chairs, couldn't feed themselves, dress themselves, or go to the bathroom by themselves… And I'm supposed to feel sorry for ME? Someone always has it worse.”

L: “Sounds like you really gained some perspective. What advice would you give other people who stutter?”

P: “Its only speech. A great book can have a cover that is ripped to shreds, but the internal content is what counts. I think that we kind of do a self fulfilling prophecy when it comes to interacting with others… ‘Oh crap, I hope I don't stutter, I hope they listen to me, I hope I don't make a fool of myself’ and... We kind of shoot ourselves in the foot before we even get started. I'm single and dating. I have no problems meeting women. I've gone on many first dates and just as often as not, I'm not interested in a second date. My speech hasn't turned me into Quasimodo.... This will sound horrible but... It’s ONLY our speech, not the quality of our character...”

L: “That's very inspiring. Do you think your character would be any different if you didn't stutter? Some people say it makes them more compassionate or patient.”

P: “I disagree. While I think that the stuttering could potentially increase patience, if you read what shows up on the different Facebook pages, there is anger, fear, frustration, a need to belong that borders on depression. I've gotten chastised for standing up for myself when others said it would have been a great chance to "educate". Personally? F*** that. Rude is rude. Granted, heat can forge steel or melt butter. It's our inner strength and strength of character that defines us and not our speech. As I told you before, I worked with severely handicapped kids when I was all of 21 years old. There are many adults who wouldn't be able to stomach what I did. I didn't think twice about it. A good person is a good person regardless of their physical quirks. Rhetorical question for you.... Would a patient or compassionate person hit on or send unwanted messages to a woman who stutters just because they think that having a common "disability" makes them a good fit? A good person is a good person and an a**hole is an a**hole regardless.”

L: “That's extremely insightful. And I definitely agree about people being rude. People make excuses. "Oh, they didn't know you stutter." That never made sense to me. They still can tell me talk differently/abnormally, even if they don't know what it's called.”

P: “Bingo. Manners are manners. Unfortunately so many have been cowed by their speech to the point that they've started to view themselves as inferior. I know what my limitations are and there are 3 jobs I'll NEVER have.... Air traffic controller, auctioneer, and a 911 operator. That being said, not everyone can do what I do for a living. So it's all good.”

I really enjoyed talking to Peter. He has some great insight for both people who stutter and those who are fluent. In all walks and situations in life we have to stick up for ourselves. 

Keep Calm and Stutter On!

 

Ryan Jones

Ryan Jones

Missouri

Liz: “What is your biggest goal in life?”

Ryan: “To talk fluently”

L: “What advice would you give to other people who stutter?”

R: “The advice I give is to find your voice and your confidence. Don't let others take that from you”

L: “I really like that. Especially applies to us who stutter. Who has influenced you most in your life?”

R: “My aunt. She volunteered to buy me a Speech Easy device. I got funding on my own.

My aunt is the best.”

L: “What would you say is your biggest fear?”

R: “Speaking in drive thru's and on the phone”

L: “I hate drive thru's also. Have you had any bad experiences/funny stories dealing with drive thru's or on the phone?”

R: “Yes going to vote and being accused of having Tourette’s. Verbally, this lady told the guy behind me to stand next to the guy with Tourette’s.”

L: “Oh wow. That's pretty assumptious.”

R: “My mom has also really been hard on me for my stutterer. She seems to accept my CP (Cerebal Palsy) a lot more.”

L: “Why do you think she's hard on you for it?”

R: “She wants perfection. She has corrected me in front of people even mocked me over 20 years ago.”

L: “I bet you're under a lot of pressure. How have you dealt with that?”

R: “My relationship with my mom isn't what I would like it to be.”

L: “Do you think that has an effect on your speech?”

R: “I fear talking to her on the phone or in person because I get defensive when she gives me
crap. Yes. The best advice for parents to a child that stutters is to not make a big deal out of it.”

L: “I agree.”

R: “My mom and loved ones close to me as a kid beat it in my head I had a problem.”

L: “How you do think your life might be different if you didn't stutter?”

R: “I live in a studio apartment and if I didn't stutter I'd make more money a long time ago, married with kids.”

L: “Because you would have a different job?”

R: “Yes.”

L: “What job would like to have?”

R: “CEO of a big company or something like that.”

Parents of children who stutter: Your reaction and your response to your child’s speech 100% has an effect on them. I can attest to that from personal experience. Both of my parents were amazing and extremely patient and understanding. Patience is definitely key. Give your child all the time they need. The rest of the world is going to rush them for the entirety of their life. They don’t need that from a parent.